OWN WHAT GOD GAVE YOU

This one is for the ladies. Imagine meeting a great guy. He's handsome, he's successful, he's confident and charming and he's into you. He's everything you want in a man and you have amazing chemistry. And of course you can't help but notice that he also fills his jeans quite nicely. When he takes you out you know he's into you. You can feel him as you dance floor and you're thinking you found the perfect guy AND as an added bonus he's well hung. Jackpot! You tell your friends you met this great guy and they're jealous when you tell him his bulge is HUGE. You daydream about him while you're at work and after every date you go home and think very un-ladylike thoughts about him. Your mother would be ashamed.

Several dates later, after a few hot and heavy make out sessions, some dirty dancing and no shortage of increasingly dirty texts and emails, you find yourself partially clothed on the sofa. You look into his eyes coyly, unbuttoning his jeans with a devilish grin and then slowly lowering the zipper. Your heart is pounding, a wave of heat envelopes your body, your mouth is watering as you realize the moment you've been fantasizing about for days, maybe even weeks is about to become a reality.

You reach your hand inside and pause. You make one last momentary hesitation before seeing and touching it for the first time. It's massive. For the first time you shudder in fear at the consideration that this guy may actually be TOO big. You run your hands over it but you can't contain your curiosity and you know you can't wait any longer. You slip your fingers inside the waistband of his briefs and lower them to reveal a surprise that leaves you breathless.

It's so big you're in a state of shock. You see what's by far the longest...thickest...rolled up men's size 11 tube sock you have ever seen.

And underneath is a cocktail weenie. He tells you not to worry, he has other talents.

Ladies, we know it's tempting but please, please, for the sake of humanity PLEASE  resist the urge to enhance your assets by non permanent means when dating. The Wonderbra is public enemy #1. And if you wear a waterbra or some other supreme boobie enhancing padded device forget it. You don't realize what you're doing to us with those things. You see, what you don't know about men is that when we're interested in a woman we picture her naked. We get excited by the idea of you unveiling your body for the first time. We wonder what a woman's boobs are shaped like, are they soft or firm, are the nipples pink or brown, big or small and one of the most exciting things for us is to explore your body and find out.

Then when we see them or touch them for the first time it's a shock. It's like ordering a delicious chicken dish at your favorite restaurant and the waiter bringing you a plate of scrambled eggs. It's not that eggs are bad, you love eggs...but you were expecting chicken. You're hungry so you don't send it back, instead you eat it with disappointment.

And that's what you've just done. Yep, next time you unhook your padded bra and a guy is seeing you or feeling you up for the first time those mmms and ahhhs he's making sound like pleasure. Make no mistake, he's crying on the inside. Those are the sounds of disappointment.

OWN WHAT GOD GAVE YOU! If you have a small ass, wear booty shorts. If you have a big ass, wear dresses that accentuate it. If you're gifted with great natural tits, good for you. Work the hell out of them knowing it drives men crazy and yes, many women. If you have small tits, work the hell out of them. Go bra-less or wear a thin one and a sheer or super thin top and let your nipp show a bit. Be sexy. A flat chested woman who's confident and knows how to work it is hotter than some fake bimbo any day of the week. Some of the hottest women in the world have small tits - Kate Hudson, Debra Messing, Kate Bosworth, Jennifer Anniston, Amy Smart, Jessica Biel, Cameron Diaz, Sienna Miller, Hayden Panettiere, I can go on for days. All hot babes and all of them are card carrying members of the itty bitty titty committee.

Once we're with you it doesn't matter and we don't mind seeing your fake cleavage. It still turns us on since we already know what's underneath. But before then it's like a cruel bait and switch game. If you want to fill out dresses and tops and you want bigger boobs - buy them. If you want your man to love and appreciate your small tits and not ogle every busty babe he sees be real with him from the start. Chances are it's just your hang up and he doesn't care how big they are and probably likes them just fine the way they are - without the padding.

If you want bigger ones go for it. Get some fake ones and stop trying to trick us!

-MAX-