Friday, October 29, 2010

Booty Call Hour




As defined by Urban Dictionary:

1. Booty Call Hours

From right before or after midnight through the predawn hours.

The booty call hours apply to every night. Especially after the club.


As defined by Amelie:

The hours between midnight and 4am... anytime after 4am and that's a different brand of trouble.

During this time one might receive a "booty call". A booty call is a number of texts and calls, typically from guys or girls under the influence of beer, liquor, club drugs and Kanye West. The only purpose of these texts is obvious.... to get some epic booty.




Now the really cool thing about Booty Calls is that you don't necessarily need to be out at the club or a party to get one. You can just be hanging out with a few friends, watching a movie or even asleep. And never fear! A Booty Call is almost always a good thing. It means you're a hot piece of ass and someone wants to get up on that.



Get some!

~Amelie

Really? You Tube? Really? Kittens?????

KITTENS and CATS are the most popular videos on You Tube!

Cats are EVIL!

Cats are creepy!

Cats always seem to have something better going on. 

And, cats cough up HAIR BALLS. What does that? Honestly!

The last time I checked, cats aren't cute and grow up to be evil animals connected to the spirit world.



Last time I checked, the only kitten I liked was minced into a hot dog. 


And what's with the weird purring thing?????????


Hisssssssing at any and all kittens/cats right now,


-Raquel

Thursday, October 28, 2010

Say you like it, Bitch!!!!

Technology: I DOMINATE you!



You were put on this planet to SERVE ME!!!!

We are not created equal!

I whip YOU!

Technology, You are my servant! Never, ever, ever forget your place!


Blackberry: DIE!



Laptop: Do as you are told!


Technology: You are MY slave, now get down and lick my boot!

LICK IT!!!!

***whip***

Say you like it, Bitch!!!!!

***whip lash***

-Raquel

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

My Love Hate Relationship with JENNIFER'S BODY



No doubt, this happen to be one of the WORST movies I have ever seen. This movie was officially the BIGGEST waste of my time yet.

I hate JENNIFER'S BODY because:

This movie is horrid.

I love JENNIFER'S BODY because:

I heart Megan Fox. She's foxy!

To elaborate:

This movie was horrid because it had no plot, no distinct reason as to what happen to Jennifer and the characters were way off.

They are really only two main characters in this movie, Jennifer played by Megan Fox and our favorite little blond twit Amanda Seigfreid who played a girl named Needy. What??


Look, no cleavage! And Needy, looks, well NEEDY

Well, the story goes like this, I think. Megan Fox and her friend, played by Amanda Seigfreid, our favorite blonde twit, go see some band at a hole in the wall bar and the lead singer is into satanic crap. The lead singer is played by Adam Brody from the OC.

All of a sudden, the bar catches on fire and no one actually notices until people start catching on fire.



Megan and Amanda happen to make it out safe and Megan ends up taking off with Adam Brody and his band of devil-worshiping freaks to some remote forest to sacrifice her so that they can become famous. No one really knows this till half the movie is over.

Megan Fox comes back as blood sucking, killing, intestinal eating dead girl, and the only reason for this is because she wasn't a virgin. HELL YEA!!!!

Foxy, yeah. Blood Sucking, yeah. BUT NO CLEAVAGE????

She starts taking out the boys at her school, makes out with Amanda Siegfried (cuz she's Needy, get it?) The end result is that you are not really sure if all of this really happens cause you see Amanda attacking and killing Megan with a box cutter and her in a mental hospital.

That is it, that is all there is to this movie!

Nothing more.

NO NUDITY!!!!!

Nothing even remotely interesting to watch at all.

What is most disappointing is who wrote this film. Her name is Diablo Cody. Why do we know who she is??? She wrote fucking JUNO!!!!!!!!!!! How could Jennifers Body be so fucked up!!!!!!??? Did any of you see Juno??? It was amazing! Jennifers Body, lame!!!!!!!!!!!!!


On to why I love it:

Diablo Cody, who strips as a hobby, wrote it (as mentioned above) and Megan Fox is in it. But that is about it. Since Megan Fox pukes up a bunch of blood in the beginning of the movie, she kind of turns you off for the rest of the movie.

This was a pointless movie. If you have nothing to do and I mean nothing, meaning you should want to sell your body to crackwhores on the street before watching this movie, then I say go for it. If you have no intention of selling your body to crackwhores, then don't bother.

You want to see a movie thats actually good and funny, with a bunch of intestinal eating dead boys and girls,watch Zombieland.

That's it,


Margot

Monday, October 25, 2010

Your One-Eyed-Monkey-Spunk is a Phallic Symphony

I like weird sounds and there are many words and phrases that just sound good to me. Things that evoke imagery while simultaneously sounding odd. Here are a few that I really like.


  • Festering shit-bag
  • Infected pustule
  • Oozing blister
  • Throbbing secretion
  • Heinous member
  • FANGORIOUSLY DEVOURED BY A GELATINOUS MONSTER AHHHH (25 internets for anyone that knows where I got that)
  • Testicle-Shitting rectal wart
  • One-Eyed-Monkey-Spunk
  • Sphincter sucker
  • Ass-monger
  • Phallic symphony


What are your favorite disgusting words and phrases? I can't be the only sick-ass around here.
Why that sentence will never be the same to me.