"I'd bag Lindsay Lohan" From our Guest Writer, Max

I'd welcome her with open arms when she crawled in through the window after a wild night of clubbing and pappararazi dodging and crotch flashing. 

I think she took one hit too many

I'd tap that

I would offer her a pair of replacement underwear for posterity's sake, thank her for her contributions and her inspiration of today's youth. Then I'd ask her why she's only wearing one shoe.

Yes, with shame and humiliation I admit I'd still bag Lindsay Lohan without so much as a momentary hesitation.

Why, you ask? 

Because I might catch her on a good day. And it would be a good story. That and everyone knows celebrities get the best drugs and as jacked up as she must be it's not impossible for her to forget what day it is and spend all her time getting intoxicated off my cock sauce. Plus who knows, she may still have some money left. If I'm lucky she'll take me shopping and buy me a Ferrari as her way of thanking me for a night she probably already forgot due to her drunken blackout...just after she wakes up from her nap.

-MAX-